Some Thoughts on Re-entry: Practicalities
Last post addressed those re-entering their home culture, this one is a bit more practical for those supporting re-enterererererers (a hard word to know when to end)…
Be Prayerful:
Particularly for those who have returned from overseas Christian work, it is tempting for those in the home country to gradually lose them from the prayer list. They still need your prayers, especially in the first few weeks when it is hardest. Why not make special time to pray with them?
Be Attentive:
Asking the right questions is a minefield, as people often come across and disingenuous (“So…how was (your life-changing year overseas)?”), patronising (“Oh, I bet you miss it”), or just don’t quite get it (“How did you find [insert blatant stereotype]?’). However, it is even worse when people ignore the fact that you were ever gone. Some friends of mine were supported by their church for a short-to-mid term mission, yet upon re-entry were just expected to fit back into the church with no mention of their return. Re-enterers want to talk about their experiences, but in my case I needed a lot of the right questions over a number of weeks before I finally got most of it out. Give them opportunities: big group, small group, 1-1…
Be Practical:
Ask re-enterers how you can practically help them. While they may have no idea where to start, keep asking for the first few months so they have the opportunity to mention things as they come up. I had it easy as I just began to mooch of my parents again, but many will need help with accommodation; cars; pick-up from airports/debriefs/information nights; money; a place to escape to; short-term work; technological assistance…
It’s also tough to re-engage socially at first, so be available to be a friendly-face, a conversation starter, an escape-plan for their first weeks of integration. It may also be profoundly practical to offer the loving rebuke when they withdraw/condemn/whinge too much (many thanks Gareth…).
Be Thinking:
I’ll jot down some of the things to think through in the next post, but try and think about what has changed since they left, or what is most different from their host culture. Do you need to give them a crash course on a pop culture phenomena (I had to catch up on Flight of the Conchords,The Dark Knight…)? Do they need help with a new technology (think Iphone for those who’ve been in Africa for a decade)?
Be Genuinely Happy:
I realise this sounds odd, but there is nothing like having people genuinely pleased to see you, and genuinely positive about having you back, hearing your new insights, sharing your challenges…People willing to learn from re-enterers are a rare breed indeed, but it should be a two-way process!! I thank God for two people in particular who gave me the warmest welcomes, followed by real interest in how I saw the world differently, and loving correction to keep me humble.
Posted: Jan 23, 13:51 Category: Re-entry
Tags for this article: cross-culture, mission, re-entry
Phone · Jan 26, 13:17
once again, thanks for this joel. I can see some of these being issues for Dave and Sarah.
PS. Lewis Hamilton won the 2008 F1 Championship. Just doing my bit to get you back up to date…